Hi Friends! Camiwins here, with another Plan With Me video. A big thank you to those returning to my channel and a warm welcome to the new guys. This month’s episode is going to be a little bit different and extra special. In addition to showing you how I planned this month’s spreads, I will also be sharing a very private and personal experience that inspired this theme for May. I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell this story on my channel and I can’t think of a more perfect moment.
As quick reminder to the new and old, you can always find the materials I’ve used in this video in the description below. Also, if you didn’t know, at the start of the year I chose NEVERLAND as a universal theme for my bullet journal, so all of my months have something to do with Peter Pan and Neverland. I’ll be sure to link those videos as well.
Now take out your journals or planners, grab some tea and Plan With Me.
For the month of May, I was inspired by two things: mothers day and the blooming wildflowers in my garden, which gave me the idea for a perfect theme… “Wendy’s Day”. Since I knew I would be pouring my heart out in this video, I did not hold back on the art and sketched out Wendy on 2 pages full of leaves and flowers.
On the cover page, I drew Wendy sitting in the garden, amongst the flowers, in a very deep & rather grown-up thought. She has been in Neverland for quite some time now and is contemplating whether or not it is time to go home, her brothers are forgetting who their parents are and she, herself, can barely remember what ther mother looks like.
As I outline the sketch using my Faber Castell Pit Pens, I want to explain why this is the most important moment in the book. Wendy is faced with the choice of staying young forever or finally growing up. If she stays, she chooses everlasting youth and becomes a pretend mother to Peter and the Lost Boys forever. However, if she returns to her parents, she will be chased the ticking crocodile clock, growing old and risk forgetting all of her memories of Neverland. It is in this moment that she unknowingly takes the first step towards womanhood and being a real mother.
Earlier in the video I said that I would be sharing something personal and this is where we’re going to get a little sad, but I promise you, it ends well. If you want to skip ahead and get to the planning, by all means go for it! However, if you’re willing to stay and listen, you can watch me paint the cover page in real time with my 48 color Sakura Koi Watercolor Travel Palette.
I chose this specific moment because it perfectly sums up how my own life has been and where my heart is right now. In my previous vlogs and videos, I talk about how I’m overcoming depression but I never say why I was depressed in the first place. Last year, at the very start of 2017, my husband and I got the crushing news that our baby had no heartbeat. I then miscarried at exactly 11 weeks and 6 days. Now, I won’t be going into too much detail since that would be a whole other video, but I do want to express that I have never felt a greater pain, loss and emptiness than the night my body started to let go of our baby. Mother’s day was extra hard for me last year but I’m proud to say that this year was better. This year instead of choosing sorrow, I chose hope. Instead of finding pain, I found faith. And instead of living in doubt, I embraced love.
After enduring a year of surgeries to correct the physical damages of the miscarriage, I’m so incredibly happy to announce that we will be starting In Vitro Fertilization (aka IVF) in June. If I have learned anything from this experience, it’s that both my husband and I are so ready to have kids. Going through this together has made us stronger and more secure in our love for each other. I could not have gotten through this without his support. And believe it or not, Bullet Journaling helped me heal in ways that I couldn’t have imagined. When I didn’t want to get out of bed, I would watch other youtubers which would inspire me to get out a notebook and plan or draw. Eventually, I was starting to journal everyday and do daily chores. It doesn’t seem like much now, but when you’re grieving and the bed just seems so much safer … you take little victories when you can.
That is why I am dedicating this video to Wendy and the other Would-Be-Mothers out there. After all, we are just young girls who’s heads were once are filled with wild stories and dreams and something inside of all of us is being drawn to our next big adventure… becoming a mother.
Moving on from the cover page, I’m trying out something new with the next spread. I really enjoyed doodling memories for the month of April, so I expanded on that and dedicated a spread for Writing & Doodling. There’s no real structure to it, so I just created a simple border and wrote the title of each page on the very bottom. You’re going to see me utilizing the bottom of my pages a lot more because I tend to write sloppier as my hand runs out of paper to rest on. You’ll see what I mean a little later in the video.
The next couple pages have been a staple for me this year and it’s my “Project Page” and “Brain Dump” page. I’ve used this spread a lot and I really find them helpful. I have 4 boxes that I dedicate to a group of tasks that can be categorized under a bigger project. For my brain dump page, I can put anything that doesn’t really have a place anywhere else in my journal. From lists to ideas or just writing quick reminders. The brain dump page has been perfect for keeping random things organized. You’ll also notice that I’m simply decorating my pages with flowers and leaves, which ties everything together nicely without cluttering the page. I’ve found that in my February spreads, I did not utilize the pages that had too much going on. Clean, simple designs work for me the best.
Now for the main course… my monthly calendar. I’ve experimented with larger boxes and so far, I like the look of it more than anything. Making a larger calendar means I can really plan out the month and write in as many items as I need to. To be honest, I don’t really put any events on here (even though I should), but what I’ve been struggling with lately is having one source of information for all my events. I use my phone & google quite a bit to manage my calendar because I can easily add things to my husbands calendar or change times & dates. Also, I have a wall calendar in our bedroom that I use more than my journal. So I have to brainstorm some ways to give the calendar in my bullet journal some real purpose without redundancy.
And finally, my weekly spreads. I’ve kept the same layout that I’ve been using for most of the year with one small change. I’ve decided to put the mini calendar and week overview on the bottom. Like I said earlier, I’ve had problems with sloppy handwriting when my palm can’t rest on an even surface, so when my hand reaches the bottom of the page like this, it makes it difficult to write. I solved this by moving the writing area higher on the spread which will allow me to have more room to rest my hands as I fill in tasks.
Thank you so much for sticking with me, I know this was a long one, but I really wanted to give you guys a closer look at how I go about planning my themes and what they mean to me. Bullet Journaling has been one of the creative outlets that have not only improved my planning skills, but it has also helped me get through my depression by organizing my thoughts and tasks in a way that works for me. I hope that you’ve enjoyed this video and found something that you could use and apply in your own Bullet Journal adventure.
If you liked this video, please hit that thumbs up button and feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below, I would love to hear from you bullet journalers, mothers and artists. And if you haven’t already subscribe to my channel for more vlogs and videos.
That’s it for my Plan With Me video for May. To all the other wendy mothers out there, happy mothers day. And anyone else who’s in the same boat as me … happy future mothers day!